Saturday, October 3, 2009

Katie Coruic

Oh! Another controversial girl named Kate! Why? Because she is not an over the top beauty and is actually a reasonably hard news person. For starters, yes, she is more of an 'everywoman' and not as remarkable as Katie Fey, for example. But, if you were at your kids soccer game and saw this MILF jumping up and down what would you think?

You'd hit it like the fist of an angry god. And don't even bother trying to say 'nuh uh' because I know better. She is a good looking woman. Plus she's got that thing going on with her poofed out jowls on her lower lips that I like. No, I don't know what it is but you know what I'm talking about. Go check her out on youtube and pay attention to the bottom lips, you will see what I mean.

Cate Blanchett

Cate Blanchett is an accomplished actress. She is well respected in the movie industry and I have a soft spot for her because she was one the original design inspirations for my favorite video game babe, Cate Archer. Oddly enough for as pretty as Cate is, it can be hard to find a picture of her looking hot, like this:

It's like she's always doing weird stuff with or hair or something to look artsy. She seems like one of those women who scorns her good looks because it gets in the way of her being taken seriously. Kind of like Megan Fox, the poor girl is an accomplished artiste' who cant seem to break past her beauty.

Hooo wahh!! I'm just messin' wut ya, she sucks. But Cate Blanchett is the real deal.

Friday, October 2, 2009

Katey Sagal

Katey Sagal is not the definition of a 'classic beauty', that is true. But she has more sex appeal in her left leg then most modern actresses have in their whole body. Katey came to fame playing  undersexed housewife Peg Bundy on 'Married with Children'. For some reason, Al Bundy never wanted to tap her. There was something wrong with Al. Maybe he is into BBW's, what the hell do I know. Anyway, here's a recent picture of Katey. Notice something weird?

She gets hotter the older she gets. Hell, she's hotter then Christina Applegate (who played her daughter on Married with Children) at this point. It's like she has that weird disease like that Button guy in that one movie thing with the Brad Pitt. At this rate by the time she hits 70 she is going to be the sexiest thing on 2 legs, or a walker.

Thursday, October 1, 2009

Catherine Bach

Catherine 'Daisy Duke' Bach needs no introduction, but I'm going to give you one anyway. If you were a young, impressionable boy who was a fan of  'The Dukes of Hazzard' TV show when it was originally on the air there is at least one trait you still carry to this day; you either have a thing for 1968 to 1970 Dodge Chargers, or you beg your girlfriend/wife to dress up in a pair of Daisy Dukes and say things like 'aw shucks' or call you Cletus while you chase her around the house.

Hell, maybe your like me and want both. Jessica Simpson played Daisy in the remake of 'The Dukes of Hazzard' and it was quite nice, but seriously, accept no substitutes.

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Catherine Bell

Ohhh, remind me what show she was on again? NCIS? CSI Miami? Hell I dont remember, but I do remember that she is one hot hot variation of Kate. I do remember she had a short haircut on the show though, bleh.

Oddly enough she reminds me of a hotter version of the mom on Everybody Loves Raymond. Now I have to see if that woman is named Kate.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Kate Bosworth

I don't know too much about Kate Bosworth. I know she was in the last Superman movie and that she is very tiny. The girl looks fragile. But, I give her a place in the Kates because she is a beautiful woman.

I've seen recent pictures and she's so small! Does she eat? Someone that loves her feed her a turkey sandwich and send me some nudies to prove she is ok. I care and am worried.

Monday, September 28, 2009

Kaite Winselt

I remember when Kate Winslet was in Titanic that many of us thought she was super hot for being a 'bigger girl'. Woo! Ah man! ha! Oh, we were so young What little did we know the horrors to come. Anyway, I stated before that I'm not a huge fan of the blondes, but if Kate Winslet is a true blonde then she would be my definition of an exception.

True story; Kate Winslet is actually smart and a good actress. Weird huh? Our list so far has a lot of beauties but not a lot of brains (Katie Holmes turned down 'The Dark Knight' to do 'Mad Money' for chrissakes). But Winslet's the real deal. Good for her.

Sunday, September 27, 2009

Kate Hudson

I dont have a lot to say about Kate Hudson. She is a very beautiful woman, and she is blonde. I'm not too much into the blondes.

I would not kick her out of bed for making crackers, as you Americans say. She did marry a rock star, so that would kick her off the MENSA list, but other then that, she is a good addition to the Kates.

Saturday, September 26, 2009

Katie Holmes

Katie Holmes is adorable. She kind of looks like Katie Feys twin sister that her family would refer to as 'the one that  finished college'. She is married to Tom Cruise. If you can't fathom why she married Tom Cruise, please refer to my post about Catherine Zeta Jones.

Some pictures you see her with cold sores on her lips. Some people says its other things, but I do not believe it. You don't see her husband with cold sores on his lips, which means he doesn't get them or he uses his religion magic to heal himself. Or a worse thought; he doesn't do 'the deed'.  That would make him a wussy. I don't believe that either because he played 'Maverick'. Maverick wasn't a wussy.

Friday, September 25, 2009

Katie Fey

I love Katie Fey. So much in fact that she is on my 'to-stalk' list. The list is short, I don't stalk just anybody. I've sent her some warm-up emails so as not to startle her, because I'm not a jerk.

I think that Katie Fey is just about as close to my minds eyes vision of a Perfect Storm of female completion that I've ever seen, I just wish she wore glasses sometimes. But she doesn't wear much; in fact it's difficult to find a picture of her with clothes on. I think she has a 'no clothes' clause in her contracts. Hey, I'm cool with that. I think more women should have enough chutzpah to make those kinds of difficult decisions. I tried the 'no clothes' clause but I  got arrested and propositioned by a guy named Grady in jail. It doesn't work for me.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Catherine Deneuve

Fun Fact: Catherine Deneuve is French.
I do not know if she is hairy. I can only fantasize that she is (I like girls with hair. If I wanted to date a 12 year old girl, then I'd just date a 12 year old girl). Here's a picture:

I hear that the red headed chick from Grey's Anatomy / Private Practice gets compared to her a lot. I can kind of see it. That girls hot too, I'm going to see if her name is Kate (edit - "oh it is! chicka-chicka-bow-wow! Look for her to be added as well.")

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Kate Gosselin

Ha! You were not expecting Kate Gosselin to appear on our magical list of Kates, were you!
Many things are said about Kate Gosselin, but they are never uttered with the word 'hot' in them. Well, I defy anyone to look this good after having 8 kids. Go ahead, try it!

Sure, she shares a hair stylist with Mary J. Blige. Sure, she is a bit testy. Sure, I imagine you could go spelunking in her vagina. Sure, she sent her husband running in horror like an escaped POW that was beaten on a daily basis. But look past that, and you will see a true hottie that some lucky man is going to claim as his own; and her eight kids .

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Catherine Zeta Jones

Doe's anyone remember the 1998 movie 'Zorro', with Antonio Bandera's and Hannibal Lector? Of course you do, it was on TV just the other night. That movie was pretty much what made Catherine Zeta Jones famous. She came onto the screen as a young, hot Latina Goddess (except she is Welsh)

Men all over the world always ask the same question. Why the heck did she marry Michael Douglas. Let me explain it to you because if you are asking that question you have even less of a clue about women than I do.

  1. He is a handsome man; deal with it
  2. He has charm and self confidence
  3. He has an assload of money and fame
See how easy that was to figure out? It's not like she's stupid.

Monday, September 21, 2009

Kate from 'Lost'

Yea, yea, her real name is Evangeline Lily, I know. But everyone knows her as Kate from 'Lost', so it counts.I also know that most Lost fans are sick of her whiny character and if she got eaten by Hurley know one would cry in their Cheerios, but let's look beyond that for a second;

She is smoking hot! And probably near the top of our 'Kates' list. No real guess there, she is just an amazing specimen that should be kept in pristine condition for all the world to enjoy

Sunday, September 20, 2009

Kate Jackson - The Ignored Charlies Angel

Oh poor Kate Jackson, always overlooked by the ridiculously hot Jaclyn Smith and the late, great, super blonde Farrah Fawcet. Was Kate ugly? Were her knee's too sharp? Dandruff? Let's take a look.

Wow! Yea, wait. Yea. Wow! Ok, there was nothing wrong with that girl. What a babe. For some reason I don't remember her looking that hot on Charlies Angels. Maybe she saw who she was working with, threw her brush into the air and said "f*ck it, I'll just be the one that can act". But to be fair, 'Farrah Mania' took offer soon after the show hit the small screen and Jaclyn was just beyond amazing. It would be like driving a Corvette in a Formula One race; you're pretty awesome as it is, but you dont have a real chance.

Kate Beckinsale

Now we're talkin'! When it comes to the hot list of Kates, Kate Beckinsale is near the top of the list. Why? Well if you can't tell from the obvious, here's a few reasons;

  1. She's British, and those girls come with the hottest accent on the planet (unless you're a British male, then I suppose you could give a crap about it. Hell, I'd probably jump Hillary Clinton if she had a British accent)
  2. She exudes class. You know, that old school class that seems to be missing from many modern actresses (but that could just be the accent. For all I know she spits chewing tobacco).
  3. She's a MILF. There's just something about a momma that can keep herself up. Wha's up, Hot Muhma?

Kate Moss

Here's another Kate that gets slammed by the major and minor league media; Kate Moss.
Here's what her critics say (and my response);

"She does drugs!" - who cares
"She's getting fat!" - you need glasses
"She's getting old!" - so'se your mom
"She's a bitch!" - scandalous. who would a thought a supemodel would be mean

She's an A+ super hot drug taking, fat, old bitch in my book then.

Katy Perry

I'll start it off with the latest Katie Flavor of the Month; Katy Perry.

Sure, she's talented. She's a good signer, maybe even a songwriter? I don't know. But that's not what this list is about. She's stinkin' gorgeous. I notice a lot of blog type people rip on Katie Perry for whatever dumb reasons, but that's a bunch of crap. Sure she kinda has a shifty eye, looks like the type of girl that can out drink an Irish firefighter, and spells her name wrong but she's still a major league babe.

An Ode to Girls Named Kate

I thought it was about time I made a small salute  to the many women I fantasize about named Kate (or it's variants like Cathy, Katie, Catherine, and the like). There's a lot of them. I find that most of them that I like share a similar theme; slender, beautiful, and brunette. Weird, aint it?
I'm not going to rank these beautiful women in any particular order, and I'll be adding them as I go.